Why Do People Self-Sabotage Their Relationships?

People self-sabotage their relationships for a variety of reasons, such as fear, low self-esteem, trust issues, high expectations, and inadequate relationship skills. To protect themselves from potential hurt, people often employ strategies like withdrawing, becoming defensive, and attacking their partners. My team and I define relationship sabotage as counterproductive attitudes and behaviors within (and outside) relationships that prevent them from succeeding or lead people to give up on them. One form of romantic self-sabotage is to choose partners who are simply wrong for you.